CYBER MONDAY SALE

It's CYBER MONDAY and I'm having a HUGE sale in my Etsy shop! All prices are reduced to 50% off, plus every customer receives a FREE gift today only! Don't pass up the deals. Baby items, adult winter wear and more! Here's the link to My Shop.

Thanksgiving

I am giving thanks today, for one reason in particular. Most people are thankful for time with family today, and I am too. But the thing on my mind that I'm thankful for today is ~ my mom. No, she is not physically here with me, but I am thankful for her. I am so blessed to have been raised by a wonderful woman like my mom. She loves my dad and always did, so very much. She loved my brother and I as children with a great motherly love. She did many things for me over the years. The best thing she ever did for me was to love me unconditionally. I could always count on her. I could tell her ANYTHING, and know that she would still love me. As an adult she was my best friend and supported me so very much. She was my rock when I left an abusive ex. She supported me when I met Matt and dated him. She celebrated with me when I married Matt. No matter what I needed, she could give it to me. I miss her physical presence, but I know that her love goes with me every single day. I feel her in my heart. I love her FOREVER.

I'm thankful for Matt, who became my best friend when we dated. Without him, I could not have handled the last few weeks since my mom went on to heaven. He is the best husband and friend a woman could ever even hope for. There are no words to express my love for him. I praise God for him every day.

Grief

"Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief." Psalm 31:8-10

I read this Psalm yesterday, and this line fits how I've been feeling with the loss of my mom. Enough said.

Healing

It's been almost two weeks since my wonderful mommy went to heaven. I've been having weird days. I live moment to moment. Always I feel thankful that she's my mom, she made me who I am. I have learned from her how to smile through pain, physical and emotional. She always smiles. I still talk of her in the present tense because her spirit lives even though her body does not. I would rather have loved her and been a part of her life and have this pain now than to never have loved her at all. I just miss her. I always will, every moment of every day, for the rest of my life.

When I'm not working, I'm crocheting. It's very healing and makes me feel closer to her.. since she taught me how. My heart is broken into a zillion pieces, and even when it feels more healed, there will forever be the scars. There is a Christian song out that is my theme song right now, by Tenth Avenue North. Hold My Heart. I have heard it a lot lately and love it. I was crying tonight when it was on. Not totally bad tears, sort of sad and good at the same time. Weird. Today I've been very weepy, little things make me cry. Then I feel joy, then I feel sadness again. I have been wearing a long black sweater that she had, and I feel SO close to her when I wear it. It's snuggly like a hug from her.

This is sort of a rambling post, but that's what I do lately. Life doesn't totally make sense. I miss her so much. I'm thankful for the kids, my dad , family and my friends. I look forward to the holidays, she would want me to enjoy them as much as possible even through the pain. She loves the holidays. She loves me, forever. Thanks for all the prayers that have been said the last several months. I will always remember the support I've received from my friends. Love you all.